Finding myself

It is funny how you get to a place in your life and you stop and think, "What am I doing here? Where will I go next, and why am I doing these things?". It takes a while to answer those questions, but after time and much thought they all come together.

I remember back when I got home from my first trip from Peru and thinking why did I go? Did I really make an impact on the lives of those I worked with and served? Well I managed to get there by the grace of God and He had a plan for me. I didn't see it while I was there or even when I got back, it didn't come until just about now. I Got home and knew that for some reason He was pulling me back there. I had to get back to Peru, but why I didn't know. I do know now that He had me go there the first time so that I could come back and work now. Other wise I doubt I would have found out about it and would have gone on to do something else. I am here now to serve Him and his children but why else am I here?

I came with the expectations of being involved in some of the daily programs like jewelry making, arts and crafts, physical education, and games. When I got here Sam told me I was going to be doing jewelry, good I expected that, then she said working in the kitchen and working with Kevin and helping out with homework. Wait what? I was not expecting that at all. But with a new found love of being flexible I smiled and said I would do those things. But then my scheduled changed again and I wouldn't be in jewelery but in the garden and not tutoring but working with Julie. Aah, so again my life has been rearranged. But I again smiled and said I could do those things. As time goes by I get placed in different spots, helping cover houses and helping with laundry and cleaning the houses. I am getting more and more used to change and am learning that God is placing me in these different situations because one day they will be useful and right now I can learn to serve in many areas instead of just one.

I was working in the garden today, preparing the soil so I could plant vegetables, and I had a lot of time to think. I thought about Mrs. Sarah Ellen and how I would love to have her help me out digging and stirring the soil around on our knees and with our hands, getting dirty and laughing or having a good conversation. I also thought about how at first I was sceptical about working in the garden and how I knew nothing about seeds and growing them. I looked around and saw the many stages of growth. Hard soil in need of tilling, freshly planted rows, rows that had tiny sprouts coming out of them, and lastly the sprouts that had grown just over the weekend. How fulfilling these things were to see. That I with my own two hands, plus the help of some kids and tools, did this. It was so cool! I then was thinking about why God had me working in the garden, the kitchen and with two of our needy adolescents.

As I was working thoughts of my future were racing through my head. I have thought about teaching, being an artist of some sort, going to grad school for design or ceramics, when it hit me. Maybe I should write, but not just anything something to make an impact on those that mean the most to me...children. I could take pictures and then make them into children's books. This is just a thought. I have been writing more and I realized that the thoughts in my head become stories when I work alone. Just another thought. I still have a year ahead of me and I know that God will place me where He wants me.

So maybe I am not only here in Peru to serve God but to get to the next place in my life. My life is full of journey's and I am finding that each of them is very different. Where will He take me next and what will He do with me? Only He knows for know, but I know that with time and prayer He will make it clear for me. For now I will enjoy my time in the dirt, hand washing clothes, helping in the kitchen, and where ever else I am needed!

Here are some pictures from this afternoon I hope you enjoy!

Love you all!